Category Archives: topps design team sucks as much as doninis

Topps Has Gotten Worse Than Panini

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My god, this breaks every rule in the fucking book:

Maybe Topps and Panini should get together and take a class on how to design cards. Lesson 1, not every single card needs to have five hundred things put into it. I mean, look at this piece of poop, why are those bat swatches even necessary? Secondly, and more importantly, why is the ticket stub idea making a comeback? Topps TX football must not have been enough of piece of crap to ditch the idea all together. Seriously people, who takes a look at this card and says, “YES! Run that shit!”?
One other thing, does that ticket stub even have any fucking importance what-so-ever? It just seems like its just another fucking game that someone played in. How funny would it be if Markakis sat that one out? I would laugh.
If this is what card design has come to. Holy fuck.

I Have A Few Questions About Bowman Sterling After Seeing This

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Fast forward through the A & G to see Topps’ latest high end fail.

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PZuiAgRBOwk&hl=en&fs=1&]

First, who thought it was a good idea to produce cards that look like mugshots? What. The. Fuck.
Second, I am wondering why the board they printed on looks like a rave in cardboard form. So distracting.
Third, was it really THAT important to stuff that swatch in there on the rookie autos? What does it add?
Seriously, anyone who is going to pay 250+ for this crap needs their head checked. There wasnt one single reason to go after any of the cards the way they looked here.

The Song Never Remains The Same

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I was doing my usual ebay updates to see what was coming now that Chrome is live, and I stumbled across this crap. I am shocked, to say the least.

Ooof, that is pretty rough. Im not sure why this was greenlighted, consdering the patch intrudes on the subject of the card. Never really stopped anyone before, right?
For some reason, last year, Topps Chrome added a new feature card to a product lineup that didnt need a new feature card. Numbered ridiculously low, the rookie auto patches were squeezed into a set that had no reason to include jersey cards. This year, the cards are unfortunately back, but thanks to the new design, there is practically no space to include the relic. So, instead of doing the right thing and ditching this idea, they put the cards in the set again without regard for how they look.
Its definitely too bad, mainly because Chrome was always that one product you could count on to avoid the gimmicks. As of this year, BOTH Topps Chrome and Bowman Chrome will have these cards, and I have no fucking idea why. Is it really THAT important to add one more needless parallel, especially when the patches arent game used? Its like putting a PS3 console in a car for the driver. Why is it even necessary?
Listen,the solutions is pretty simple. This set would have sold regardless of these stupid looking cards, cant we just understand that they arent needed? They look ridiculous, they dont fit, and the cards are so rare that it shouldnt even be an issue. Keep Chrome free of gimmicky cards, its one of the last products that can still float without needless relics. I hope Topps will do their best to honor that in the future.

Topps Exclusive Is Bad For Business

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Topps may have gotten the exclusive and put themselves in a great position, but its the collector that once again gets the shaft. Regardless of what Topps will do in the coming years, it will be without “true” competition, thus leading to more stale crap like Triple Threads and Sterling. Without having to put up with logo bearing products from UD or Panini, Topps is free to release anything they want without fear of losing customers to the competition.

Exclusives are never good, regardless of how they are sliced, as competition has always been the way better products are made. Considering that some Topps products are already the worst on the calendar, this is bad news all around. Im sincerely hoping I am wrong, trust me.
This is not to say that UD or Panini will not release unlicensed products, but they shouldnt have to do it that way. Granted, as UD has said, its more about the players than the logos on the jerseys, which I agree with 100%, but others arent smart enough to actually see past this original article. I say that UD takes a dive in baseball like nothing we have ever seen, unfortunately, therefore putting more strain on the already overburdened football brands to carry the company. Lucky for UD, the other two in that area are like one legged men in an asskicking contest.
Here’s to my now even more greatly reduced baseball collecting habits.

2009 Bowman Chrome Football Has Become A Freak Show

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Topps? Seriously? You are messing with the one product that isnt broken?

The preview spread sheet has been posted, and I am shocked that Topps took Bowman Chrome in this horrible direction. As you can see, they have added relic autos and relic refractor autos to the set, and they are so poorly conceived that they make Prestige Chrome look well put together. Why do we need a relic if it is going to cover up the fucking subject of the card? It not that fucking important! A Chrome auto /10 would be worth a bunch regardless, why destroy the one card that could sell the product? I know that Upper Deck has mentioned to me on a number of occasions that Topps is developing a product to compete directly with SPA, and I hope that Topps didnt choose Chrome as the way to do it.

Oh, but wait! THERE’S MORE!

Now we are having a repeat of the signed letters from Bowman Draft Picks? Why? We get that UD broke new ground with the signed manu-letters in SPA a few years ago, but I dont think they intended Topps to take the idea and repeatedly beat it into a fine mush. Every goddamn Topps product has letters – signed and unsigned. ENOUGH IS ENOUGH.

Bowman Chrome was great BECAUSE of its simplicity, not despite it. Topps has bastardized a standard in low-end with needless upgrades that sway from the original ideas. Here is the letter all of us should write to the leadership:

Dear Topps,

Fuck you. You ruined Bowman Chrome.

That is all.

Disrespectfully,
(INSERT YOUR NAME HERE)

What is happening with this shit? Jesus.